Chapter 3

3: 3

It wasn't just the exhaustion in my mind. My body had nothing left to give either.

But to Zane, all of that was just laziness, proof that I lacked the right attitude.

After another spell of dizziness sent me home on sick leave, I found my mother-in-law had been brought back to the house. The widow and Melvin were there too.

I thought I was walking into another round of the whole family piling on me. Instead Zane pulled out a chair for me, a smile stretched across his face.

My mother-in-law, who was never easy to please, actually told my husband to serve me some food.

I felt myself floating a little, thinking they had finally seen everything I'd given.

Then the next second.

"Irma, it's been three years since our eldest passed. He treated all of you well while he lived. What your mother is saying is that Zane should take a second wife to carry on both family lines. It would settle things properly with your brother-in-law too."

The happiness froze at the corners of my mouth. I turned to my husband, hoping he would say something. All I got was silence.

Seeing me look at him, something uneasy flickered across Zane's face, but he quickly found an excuse for this absurd two-households arrangement.

"You know the Sheldon family, the richest family around. She's their child who got lost to them years ago. Because it's a second marriage, it's hard for her to find a husband. The Sheldons have promised that if I take her and Melvin in, they'll give another dowry. Then we'll have money for the charity work, and you won't have to work yourself so hard."

"Good Irma, good wife, your husband knows how sensible you are. Don't worry, even if she marries in, you'll still be the first wife. I love you most."

Zane came over and pulled me into his arms. It was the warm embrace I'd longed for, and yet inside I was ice cold.

I forced the corners of my mouth into some kind of curve, half crying, half smiling.

"Not marry her. Can't we just not?"

Zane's eyebrows shot up, contempt threading through his voice.

"If I don't, how do we pay for Mrs. Lewis's leg next month? What about the tuition for Mrs. Wong's kid? And Mother's medical bills. Irma, you're my wife. You should understand how hard my position is."

"And if you hadn't shamelessly thrown yourself at me back then, I was the one who was supposed to marry Cornelia Finch in the first place!"

"Don't look at me like that either. We've been husband and wife all this time, so here's the deal. If you can earn three hundred this month, I'll do it your way."

Three hundred? A month of grinding work, and at the very most I made a hundred and fifty. Three hundred was double that.

But what else could I do?

I truly couldn't accept this ridiculous idea of him marrying his widowed sister-in-law. Two people who love each other should belong only to each other, shouldn't they?

Three hundred was almost a fantasy, but I gritted my teeth and agreed anyway.

I knew it. Zane named that number precisely because he knew I couldn't reach it. But I wanted to try anyway.

I'd just think of it as one last effort, for whatever was left of us.

For the whole month after that, I worked myself to the bone. When others slept I was still at it. When others clocked out I was still going.

Finally, at the second payout, I brought in three hundred and fourteen.

Fourteen more than I'd hoped for!

I should have been happy. But right then, watching Zane hold Melvin and laugh with such open delight, all the excitement lodged in my throat with nowhere to go.

I lifted my head and wiped away the tears before they could fall, forced a smile, and was about to step forward and call out to my husband. One step, and the whole world spun.

Blood dripped from my nose, drop after drop hitting the floor, and I collapsed hard.

The last thing I knew was the widow's coaxing voice threading through my husband's doting one, the three of them a family, drifting further and further away.