Chapter 1

On my due date, the husband who'd promised to drive me to the hospital took a detour to a bar to celebrate his childhood sweetheart's birthday.

The pain in my belly was unbearable. I kept asking when he'd get there.

He kept saying soon, soon.

But by the time my water broke and I forced myself to dial 911, the voice that came through was still his, impatient.

"Lauren Harding, I told you I'd come get you soon. Can't you have a little patience?"

"You're impossible all day long, always nitpicking."

"You may be pregnant, but can't you consider my feelings for once?"

Then the line went dead with a string of beeps.

Winston Gilbert didn't come home that night.

The first call I got the next morning was him telling me to go bail him out of the police station.

I picked up the divorce papers on my way out.

Eudora Simmons was sniffling as she explained. "Please don't be angry. It was my birthday at the club and someone was giving me trouble, so Winston stepped in to teach him a lesson for me."

Winston bowed his head too, his voice gentle as he looked at me.

"Lauren, whatever it is, let's talk about it at home. Don't make a scene here, all right?"

Everyone was watching my pale face. None of them expected me to slap the divorce papers across Winston's cheek.

"Fine. You two go get married."

"Sign the divorce papers, and stop clinging to me after this."

1

The bitter wind stirred my hair. I lowered my head. The baby I'd carried for ten months had already suffocated and died because I wasn't brought to the hospital in time.

And this was, I'd lost count, how many times Winston and I had fought because of Eudora.

Ever since this ex-girlfriend of his came back from abroad, I could never keep my emotions in check, again and again and again.

Even though today was my twenty-sixth birthday.

My phone rang. A text from Winston, apologizing, telling me not to be angry, saying he knew he'd broken his promise last night, that it was my birthday today, but that he'd still prepared a gift for me.

If this had been before, a line like that would have kept me happy for a long time.

Because before, this was always how our fights went.

He'd give me a gift or a bit of attention, coax me a little, and I'd be delighted, forget how upset I'd been, and go right back to loving him with everything I had.

Only this time...

I looked at the chat log, at Winston apologizing for the who-knows-how-manyth time because of Eudora.

Something in me eased. No anger. No grievance, no hurt anymore.

Instead there was that feeling of already knowing the ending, like a spoiler.

See. I knew exactly what he'd say next.

Every apology of his was always because of Eudora too.

The strange thing was, this time, after it all, I really wasn't sad at all.

I bought myself a hot drink.

And walked the road home alone.

The bitterness of this love, I'd truly swallowed too much of it.