Chapter 1

The night Xavier Harding threw me a birthday party, he invited his "just a buddy," Frances Summers.

The private room was loud, too loud.

Then I pushed the door open.

What I saw was a room full of strangers, his friends and hers.

The cake already cut open, hacked down to a shape you couldn't name.

The two stools pushed right up against each other, his and hers.

"Why are you so late? You made everyone wait on you."

No welcome for me, no explanation, just his cold face and the reprimand behind it.

"Come on, Lauren Rockwell didn't mean it. Sit next to me. I'm worried if Xavier drinks too much later, you won't know how to take care of him."

Xavier saw nothing wrong with any of it. He reached over, picked up the milk tea in front of Frances, and took a sip like it was his.

"Still brown sugar."

Frances's mouth curved into a smile.

"Right? None of these people get us. No taste at all. Brown sugar milk tea is the best there is."

I took out my phone and canceled the plane ticket for three days from now, the one Xavier was supposed to take to my parents' house.

If you love her milk tea that much, then fine. You're hers now.

1

"Huh, after all these years you two are still this cozy. Even your taste in drinks matches."

Their friends started ribbing them, one after another.

Frances's cheeks flushed pink.

As if she were the little girlfriend being teased in front of everyone.

"Oh, stop it, you guys, little Lauren's still right here."

"Lauren, don't read too much into it. We've all been like this for years, we're used to it."

Frances laid her hand on my arm.

I pulled my arm free and gave a cold "Mm."

Frances looked a little awkward, her brows knitting, her voice edging into hurt.

"See? Now I've made little Lauren misunderstand. Look how unhappy she is."

The whole room went quiet for a few seconds. Then Xavier spoke.

"What's with the face at Frances? You show up late, you make everyone wait, and then you act like this. Where are your manners?"

I didn't answer.

He hadn't looked.

Hadn't looked at my messages.

I'd texted him early that it was pouring and I was stuck in traffic.

He hadn't cared about the rain soaking my hem, and he hadn't cared about my messages.

"Okay, okay, Xavier, Lauren's still a little girl, she's not like me. I'm around you every day, I've practically turned into one of the guys."

Frances stepping in to smooth it over made my stomach turn.

"Come on, everyone, let's play a game."

Frances suggested it with a forced little smile, as if, after suffering some enormous wrong, she was still the one covering for me.

"Such a pain."

Xavier's words were short, but I knew exactly who he meant.

Everyone in the room wore the same look, half contempt, half enjoying the show.

As if to say that this was all the standing I had in Xavier's heart.

Frances chose truth or dare.

The first spin of the bottle in her hand landed on herself.

She chose truth.

"What's the raciest gift you've ever given?"

Frances looked at Xavier, blushing.

"Does giving Xavier underwear count?"

Gasps went up around the room.

"What's the big deal? There's nothing about each other Xavier and I haven't seen. It's just a pair of underwear. Right, Xavier?"

And with that Frances threw an arm around Xavier's shoulders.

Xavier only laughed and bumped his fist against hers.

I clenched a fistful of my skirt. In that moment, I was the outsider.

Second round, the bottle turned to me.

"Lauren, you picked truth last time, so this round you have to pick dare. I'll go easy on you, just do a plank."

I could hear the mockery in it. It was Frances all over.

I froze for a while, resisting it.

Little by little, when they saw I still hadn't moved, the room started to sour.

"Lauren, what are you killing the mood for now? It's just a plank, you can't even do that? Besides, you're pretty flat as a board yourself."

Xavier's words hit right where it hurt. He knew exactly what that surgery had done to me, the shame it left behind.

"That flat, huh, Xavier? Her figure's even worse than you made it sound."

Laughter went around the room.

"Oh, I'm sorry, little Lauren, I wasn't thinking. It's my fault. Never mind, never mind, let's stop playing, don't be upset."

I opened my mouth, and before I could get a word out.

Xavier suddenly stood up.