Chapter 3

I watched, startled, as he came running toward me.

His skin was clear.

He dressed young, too.

Nothing like a man well into his twenties.

More like he'd stepped straight out of high school.

"Look... I came to find you because I wanted to apologize.

"I heard about what happened yesterday.

"I'm really sorry! I was young then. I didn't know any better."

I heard my own voice shaking.

"Is 'I didn't know any better' supposed to cover all of it?"

"Then... then how do I earn your forgiveness? What if I got down on my knees?"

And he did, dropping with a heavy thud.

Passersby kept turning to look.

"Ash, I really do know I was wrong!

"I've regretted it all these years. Even while I was with Greta, my heart ached for you.

"Ten years have gone by.

"Just let it go. Let's all live our lives properly, all right?"

Here it was again.

The ones who do the hurting always seem to believe.

That time thins out the pain, until a single apology is enough to be forgiven.

"No."

My fist trembled a little.

"Ash..."

His eyes went red.

"Do you really have to keep dragging up the past?

"We've both started families. Greta and I even have a child now. Are you really going to keep clinging to things that are over, making everyone miserable?"

"Colin Fox."

I ground the words out. "You'd better leave right now, or I don't know what I might do to you here."

Then.

I turned and walked fast toward the psychiatric ward.

"Allan Gilbert!"

Colin shouted behind me.

The next second.

My arm was yanked hard.

I stumbled a couple of steps and steadied myself.

But Colin let out a scream.

And crashed hard to the floor.

"Col!"

Greta's voice rang out.

I saw her run over and pull Colin up.

Crack. A hand struck my face, hard.

I turned.

My father, out of breath.

His eyes red, his finger pointed at me.

"How could you be so vicious! Greta's only just pregnant, the baby's not even stable yet, and you couldn't wait, you chased Colin all the way to the hospital to torment him!"

It hit me like a bolt out of nowhere.

"She's pregnant?!"

"Don't play dumb."

Greta looked at me coldly.

"You found out, and that's exactly why you followed him to the hospital to get back at Col, isn't it?"

I couldn't speak.

My father gave a cold laugh.

"Who'd have thought. I kept it from you so carefully, terrified you'd lose it, and you still found out."

"You think I wouldn't lose it just because you didn't tell me!"

Something in me finally broke.

"Dad! I'm your son! Why do even you treat me like this!"

"Ash!"

Against all expectation.

It was Colin who rushed forward.

Throwing himself in front of my father.

"Ash, I'm the one who wronged you back then. If you have to hate someone, hate me.

"I've already taken Uncle Cyril as my godfather. I can't stand by and watch you raise a hand to him."

"Godfather?"

My voice shook.

My father looked at me coldly.

With no intention of explaining.

"Dad, say it plainly... ah!"

I was shoved hard.

Greta stood with one arm out in front of Colin.

Watching me coldly.

The scene was far too glaring.

I heard the voices of the people around me.

"So this is Ms. Sullivan's crazy husband? How far gone do you have to be to cause a scene in a hospital lobby."

"He really doesn't give off the same impression as Mr. Fox."

"No wonder Ms. Sullivan doesn't want him anymore. I couldn't take a lunatic tearing myself apart day after day either."

"Poor Ms. Sullivan. She doesn't even love him anymore, but she keeps up the marriage just so she doesn't set him off."

"And the father, too. Poor man, with a son who has no sense at all."

"..."

"Stop talking..."

I backed away without meaning to.

Those words seemed to take on weight.

Stabbing into me until every breath hurt.

I was relapsing again.

I clutched my head.

A hand closed around my wrist.

I heard the voice of Dr. Butler, my psychiatrist.

"Breathe deep. Come with me."