Chapter 4

These five years wore me down, but I felt steady all the way through. I was up at four-thirty every morning to deliver milk, three hours of it, climbing dozens of buildings to earn fifty dollars. In winter my hands split open at the knuckles, and touching cold water made me shake with the pain, but I never dared take a day off, because a day off meant no money. Then at eight I clocked in at the nail salon and worked until eight at night, twelve hours on my feet, and when it got busy I sometimes didn't get to eat at all.

After I clocked out at eight, I still went to the night market to run a little stall selling trinkets, staying until midnight before heading home. Sometimes I ran into the city inspectors and had to grab my things and run a long way, running until my shoes came off, my feet rubbed raw and bleeding, and still I didn't dare stop. I left Daisy with my neighbor, Granny Chavez. She was a good woman, and knowing how hard things were for me, she only charged me five hundred a month to watch my child. She often made nice food for Daisy too, and whenever she braised pork ribs she'd set aside a bowl for her.

One time the inspectors chased me at the market, and as I ran with my bag stuffed full of trinkets, I took a fall, and one of the silver earrings my mother had given me came loose and dropped off. I went back and searched for two hours and never found it, and I crouched at the roadside and cried for a long time. That was the only thing my mother had left me.

Daisy was so understanding she never cried or fussed for things. When she saw other kids eating ice cream, she'd turn her head away and pretend she hadn't seen. When I asked if she wanted some, she'd shake her head and say, "Mommy works so hard for money. Daisy won't have any. Daisy's going to save up to buy Mommy a big house."

Last year I finally saved up enough to put a down payment on a small apartment, four hundred square feet. It was small, but it was our own place. On moving day Daisy clutched the stuffed rabbit I'd bought her and ran back and forth through the rooms, calling out as she ran, "Mommy, we finally have our own home. We never have to move again, and we never have to be scared of the landlady coming to throw us out." I leaned against the doorframe watching her, so happy, and the tears just spilled out of me. All those bitter years hadn't been for nothing.