Chapter 1

### Chapter 1

After Felix Barnes missed getting our marriage license for the ninety-ninth time.

I opened a delivery app and found more than a dozen orders still out for delivery, every one of them women's things.

But the address field was filled in with my sister's place, all of them.

Lace lingerie of every kind, paired with the newest "toys," each one a top-shelf item that made you sit up and take notice.

Each order even came with a thoughtful little note full of innuendo, the kind of thing a couple in the honeymoon phase would send back and forth.

The most recent one was going to a hotel. Today.

With shaking hands, I left the delivery driver a five-star review.

The next second, Felix's call came through.

"Olive's a girl living alone, it isn't safe. Buying all this is just to keep up appearances. Don't read too much into it."

Don't read too much into it. Again.

Felix and I had been together eight years. He'd been sending her deliveries for five.

There were more orders after those, actually, but I couldn't bring myself to keep scrolling.

Thinking of how, all these years, Felix had always managed to find some reason to miss our marriage license appointment, I didn't have the courage to face any of it.

My chest stung as if it had swallowed ten thousand needles.

"You really are a kind man."

He went quiet.

When he spoke again, his voice had softened.

"Leila Harding, none of it's real. You know me. I've never liked your sister."

"If it weren't for the fact that you'd be hurt when something happened to her, I wouldn't lift a finger to help her."

My voice caught. "Do you have any idea how much I did to get ready for that appointment? I—"

Felix cut me off, impatience in his tone.

"We missed it this time, so we just book it again, that's all. Don't keep getting jealous over things that don't matter. She's your own sister, after all."

"Be good. I'll explain when I'm done here and come home."

Then came the busy tone of the call ending.

Right before it cut off, Olive's soft, coaxing voice slid clearly into my ear, sweetly begging him to help zip up her dress.

I pushed the surge of feeling back down.

The appointment could be rebooked, that much was true.

But Felix, the person who walks into that clerk's office with me doesn't have to be you.

...

I stood alone at the entrance of the dining room, the candle flames on the carefully set table shivering in the night breeze.

On it was the meal I'd made with my own hands, after learning to cook for three whole months just for tonight.

I'd reheated it seven times, start to finish.

Facing this warm, happy candlelit dinner, my heart felt as cold as an icebox.

"Throw it all out," I said flatly to the servant beside me.

Felix wasn't coming home tonight.

Just then, an alarm went off like a death knell, tearing mercilessly through the silence of the house.

I walked to the study and followed the shrill sound to its source.

On Felix's work tablet, I saw the alarm reminder that had popped up:

【Celebrate Olive's birthday.】

Maybe it was because the night had thrown too much at me.

I stumbled back a couple of steps, nearly falling, and had to catch myself against the edge of the bookcase to stay standing.

The first photo Felix and I ever took together, back when we'd just gotten together, still sat on his desk.

But now, staring at the man smiling so gently in the picture, I felt only that he was a stranger.

The alarm kept repeating, over and over, coiling around my mind like a curse pulled tight, until my head throbbed and I couldn't breathe.

Felix didn't like being conspicuous. He'd never once taken me out on a date anywhere public.

Birthdays, anniversaries, special days like that, he skipped whenever he could, and even when we marked them, it was only a small celebration at home.

He said he wanted to put his mind on his career first. There'd be time for grand gestures later.

I remember the first birthday I had after Felix and I got together. A month ahead, I booked the best table at a restaurant everyone was talking about.

But the moment I brought him to the door, Felix's brow furrowed.

He accused me, angry, of ruining him, saying that in the middle of the company's most important bid, I wasn't keeping a low profile, and sooner or later someone with an agenda would catch it on camera and make something of it.

In the end, he drove off alone and left me standing at the curb, not knowing what to do.

That was our worst fight ever. After that, we never had another intimate moment anywhere the public could see.

No one knew we were a couple.

For eight full years, he forgot my birthday more than once, leaving me to eat a small cake I'd bought off the street, alone, tears running down my face.

He'd forget our hundred-day anniversary, leaving me holding a bouquet, waiting up all night at home for him.

He'd even forget Valentine's Day, forget I existed, and shamelessly post on social media about watching fireworks with Olive Harding.

Because I loved him, even when he forgot all of it, I still chose to understand him, to respect his ambition.

And what I got in return was a "birthday alarm" he'd set specially for another woman.

And that woman, of all the terrible luck, happened to be my own sister...

I don't know how I made it out of the study, or how I got through that night.

Not until the door opened and Felix's voice reached my ears did I notice the sky outside had already gone pale.

"Leila? Why are you up so early?"

Clearly not expecting to see me in the living room, he froze for a second.

When I didn't answer, Felix took off his coat and draped it over me with practiced ease, pretending to be annoyed as he complained that I didn't take care of myself, dressed so lightly and sitting on the floor, when it was easy to catch a chill.

The look in his eyes was still full of love, as if everything that had happened yesterday had nothing to do with him.

Maybe because I stayed unmoved, Felix was quiet for a moment, then switched to an innocent, coaxing expression.

He pulled out a little food box he'd been hiding behind his back, scooped a small spoonful of cake himself, and lifted it to my lips.

"Leila, yesterday was all my fault. See, I brought you a little cake to make up for it. Trust me, I'll never stand you up again."

The instant the cream touched my lips, I flinched away on instinct.

Out of the corner of my eye I caught that slice of mango cake, and the logo on the box was from a place I'd mentioned wanting to try a long time ago.

Felix had always said cake was too sweet, that finishing a whole one would make me gain weight and eating less was a waste.

So to this day I'd never once tasted that cake.

And there was something more important, too. That bakery never made cut-corner slices, so this piece, barring some miracle, was what Olive had left over.

At that thought, my chest clenched hard, and my voice trembled as I asked, "Where were you last night?"

At my words, the tenderness on Felix's face stiffened, and his eyes darted away on instinct.

"Olive said spending her birthday alone was too lonely..."

Even though I'd known the answer all along, hearing the truth from his own mouth left a dull, numbing ache spreading through my chest that I couldn't hold back.

Felix had forgotten. I'm allergic to mango.

In the end, I twisted my lips into something like a smile, left with nothing but contempt for myself.

Of course. His so-called low profile and practicality, all along, had been nothing but a leash on me and me alone.