Chapter 1

There was a bead-craft keychain in Jesse Simmons's coat pocket that hadn't been there before.

I took a picture of it and showed my sister.

She laughed until she was practically shaking, then leaned in with a warning.

"Sis, this is the kind of thing young people play with."

"You'd better watch out. Jesse's definitely got someone on the side."

"And whoever she is, she's a lot younger than you. Could be she's right under your nose."

My lips pressed into a thin, bloodless line as I denied it.

"No. He's not that kind of man."

When Jesse got home from work, he was carrying a bag of pastries.

They were from a new shop, and not cheap.

He handed the bag straight to my sister.

And handed me his coat.

I lifted my eyes and met his.

"Jesse, isn't there any for me?"

He gave a helpless little laugh and touched the top of my head.

"How old are you? Fighting your sister over food."

"Tomorrow. I'll get you some tomorrow too, all right?"

The moment he turned away, the look on his face shifted into irritation.

The bead-craft keychain in his coat.

The new pastries with nothing bought for me.

I think I already had my answer.

...

I spent the whole night in the living room.

I sat from dark until dawn, my eyes shot through with red.

"Why are you up so early?"

Jesse didn't wait for an answer. He turned and went to wash up.

It was the kind of question that cost him nothing, tossed off without a second thought.

After he'd washed, Jesse sat down at the table.

He was waiting for me to pour him his hot milk and set out his sandwich, the way I always did.

But this morning, there was nothing.

His brow drew slowly together, the two lines pulling inward, a thin film of confusion rising in his eyes.

"Yvonne Butler, you didn't make breakfast?"

I turned the coffee spoon between my fingertips, watching the little whirlpools form.

"Why aren't you saying anything?"

After a long moment, I lifted my eyes to him.

"I did."

"Said what? I didn't hear anything."

"Silence."

Jesse laughed.

He pinched the bridge of his nose, a very faint sigh slipping out through it.

"Honey, I work all day and I'm exhausted. Can you not throw these little tantrums?"

He pulled up the pastry shop's post and sat down beside me.

"Here, take a look. Which ones do you want?"

My gaze fell on the screen. My hand hadn't even touched it.

"Sis, why's there no breakfast? You're going to send me off to school hungry?"

"I'm not your maid. I won't be doing any of it from now on."

My sister ignored that and turned to Jesse.

"Big brother, take me out to eat. I want dumplings."

Before I could even react, Jesse pulled his phone back.

"Sure. I'll fill you up today."

I stayed exactly as I was, barely reacting to Jesse coming or going.

While the two of them were laughing and messing around, my sister got her coat on.

"Big brother, I've got a dinner thing tonight."

She fidgeted a little, then said, "It ends at ten. Could you come pick me up when it's done?"

"A few of my classmates have seen you. They all say you're really handsome."

She grabbed his arm and rocked it gently back and forth.

The corners of her eyes drooped a little, her voice edged with pleading.

"Please? You're so good-looking, it'd be such a flex to bring you along."

Jesse flicked the tip of her nose, a light smile spreading in his eyes, his lips curving loose and easy.

"Okay, okay, okay. Whatever you want."

The two of them kept talking as they walked toward the door.

So it turned out I was like air, right there in plain sight and yet so easy to ignore.

How long had it been since Jesse and I had really talked.

Ever since Violet Butler moved out of her school dorms, I'd become the maid of this house.

Whatever she felt like eating, I had to make it for her right away.

Otherwise Jesse would say the same thing my parents did.

"Violet's your little sister. As the older one, you should take good care of her."

"What could a young girl like her be scheming? She just wants to lean on her big sister."

At the door, Jesse picked up our matching couple's umbrellas.

"Violet, it might rain today. Take your sister's for now."

"No. I like the pink one."

Jesse coaxed her, one hand pushing the door open for her.

"Fine, fine, fine. I'll buy you a pink one when I'm off work today."

"You little handful. Just take this one for now, or you'll get caught in the rain and catch a cold, and then I'll have to coax you into taking your medicine all over again."

Then something seemed to occur to him, and Jesse looked back at me.

"Honey, you'll have to make your own way to the restaurant tonight, sorry."

"If I'm picking up Violet, it won't be on your way."

The light from the doorway faded out of my sight.

And whatever was left of me sank down into the silence with it.