Chapter 5

The day I got married, the sky hung gray and heavy, and the cold wind bit at my face until it hurt.

For once, our village was lively, but my own yard carried a strange, unspeakable air.

Not a single one of the men Carrie had once beaten dared come to the feast. Word was they were afraid the madwoman would flip the tables mid-banquet.

The ones sitting in the yard were all elderly relatives and children too young to understand.

When the bride was brought through the door, nobody dared crowd in to tease the bridesmaid, and even the man on the horn kept his distance.

Carrie sat in a cheap red silk padded jacket, the red veil over her head, still and quiet on the heated brick bed of the wedding room.

Outside, everyone at the feast kept their voices low, eyes flicking again and again toward the window of the wedding room, like they were guarding against a thief.

The braised pork roast and glass noodles at the feast were usually fought over, but today everyone ate fast, scraped their bowls clean, and nobody dared linger. One by one they found excuses and hurried off.

By nine that night the whole yard had gone dead silent, and even the village dogs had stopped barking.

I carried in a basin of water for washing feet, stood at the door of the wedding room, and drew several deep breaths before my trembling hands pushed open that wooden door with the double-happiness paper on it.

Only one red candle was lit inside, the light dim, the smell of mothballs in the corner mixing with cheap face cream until I could hardly breathe.

The red quilt on the brick bed was laid out neat and even, and Carrie sat there under the red veil, not moving at all.

I set the basin down on the ground and turned to grab my worn old bedroll from the corner.

My heart was up in my throat, terrified she'd suddenly pull half a brick out from under the quilt and hurl it at me.

"That, um... there's no feeling between us yet, you take the bed, I'll sleep on the floor, and we'll grow into it slowly." I stammered the silence apart, my voice landing oddly loud in the empty room.

The room stayed quiet for a full ten seconds.

Then, all at once, a sharp whip of sound.

Carrie's hand shot up and yanked the cheap red veil off her head, flinging it hard into my face.

The red cloth slid down my face, and I stumbled back a step, my back pressed flat against the cold dirt wall.

By the wavering candlelight I saw her eyes rimmed red, tears dropping like a string of beads snapped loose, but the look in them was vicious enough to eat a man alive.

Her chest heaved hard, and she stared at me through clenched teeth, her voice shaking from how tightly she was holding it down.

"Nathaniel Dickerson, you are an absolute bastard!" She jabbed a finger right at my nose.

I was knocked completely dumb, my mind gone blank.

I opened my mouth and had no idea what to say.

Then she let out one wretched laugh, tears striking down her cheeks onto the bright red wedding clothes, and growled at me low, word by word: "If I hadn't pretended, with your family dirt-poor and rattling with nothing, how could a bastard like you ever have married me?!"