Chapter 1

1: 1

No one ever knew that the harbor magnate, the man whose name made people flinch, had been kept alive one fish at a time by me, an orphan girl from the fishing village who went out to the water every single day.

Back then he would cradle my face in his hands and say, with all the tenderness in the world:

"Fiona Sinclair, help me get my leg fixed. Once it heals, I swear I'll make something of myself on the docks. And when that day comes, I'll give you a home where you never have to worry again."

I was sick of living alone, so I clung to that promise and went out to sea day after day.

Wind or rain, I never once let myself rest.

Because I knew that if I didn't go out, Jonathan Vance could run out of money and stop his treatment at any time, and stay crippled for the rest of his life.

Later he became the magnate of the docks, and I became the woman everyone politely called "the magnate's wife."

Antiques, paintings, gold, jewelry, everything you could imagine.

And in all our decades of marriage, he never once shared a bed with me.

I became the joke of the whole harbor city, the old virgin.

Before he died, Jonathan gripped my wrist and confessed:

"Fiona, I know I never wronged you in this life. I kept every promise I made to you. But what I feel for you is gratitude, not love."

"If there's a next life, don't save me again. I want to reach this position on my own, and then spend it with someone I actually love."

When I opened my eyes again, I was eighteen, watching a boy fighting a dog for scraps of food.

...

The sea wind was salty and sharp.

But it couldn't cover the thick smell of blood.

One of the boy's legs had been bitten open, the flesh torn and raw.

I was holding out a bowl of fish soup toward him.

In my last life, this bowl of soup was what kept Jonathan from going hungry.

To repay me, he'd followed me home, washed my dishes, swept my floors.

I was no longer alone. I had him.

I just never imagined it would become the chain that bound him later.

An eagle is meant to fly free. How could I bear to break his wings?

Living it all again, I had just started to draw the fish soup back.

But Jonathan pushed my hand away himself.

The scalding soup left the back of my hand red.

In my last life, he'd have caught my hand at once, aching with concern.

But the boy in front of me only watched me, calm, those upturned eyes holding a whole summer's worth of stars.

"Thank you for your kindness, but I can feed myself with my own two hands."

"This is goodbye for good." His voice was flat.

He looked away and limped off down the road, stubborn as ever.

I knew he'd been reborn too.

A few steps in, the boy collapsed.

I only stood where I was, watching that thin figure.

I thought, in this life, letting our paths split like this wasn't so bad after all.

By the time I looked up again, Julia Butler, who lived next door to me, was helping Jonathan home.

The next day, firecrackers cracked across the sky.

The whole village had gathered outside the house beside mine.

I wandered over to see what the fuss was about.

The one everyone was crowded around was Jonathan.

He was dressed neatly, black trousers making his legs look long.

A small, delicate woman stood beside him. It was Julia.

"I got lucky yesterday and picked up a handsome boy."

"Today I'd like all of you to bear witness."

"My Julia and Jonathan are officially together now. This afternoon we're going to register the marriage."

The villagers clapped and pressed the couple for red envelopes, wanting a bit of the good luck.

I tugged at the corner of my mouth.

In my last life, Jonathan lived under the same roof as me, an orphan girl, for three whole years.

Out there my name was mud.

I'd brought up registering our marriage to him.

He didn't agree and didn't refuse. He only said to wait, that I was too young.

It was only later, when he raised the matter of treating his leg, that he registered with me.

So love and no-love really were as clear-cut as that.

I just never imagined it was Julia he wanted.

In the fishing village, Julia and I were neighbors, both orphan girls, and we'd kept each other warm through plenty of hard days.

So when I became the magnate's wife, I took Julia with me and kept her at my side as my housekeeper.

Julia was right under my nose for decades, and Jonathan still managed to hold back and never contact her.

No wonder his eyes were so full of regret when he looked at me before he died.

In this life, I'm giving him back to Julia.

And I'm curious too. I want to see how Jonathan reaches his old position on his own.