Chapter 1

I'm the family historian, and I hold dirt on countless relatives.

Yet just because I didn't offer to cut the pie for my cousin at Thanksgiving, the whole clan ganged up to mock me.

"Kathy's about to marry up into a billionaire family, and what about you? Thirty years old, single, and nobody wants you!"

"A master's degree, and you can't even measure up to a cousin who only finished vocational school. What a disgrace!"

Their faces were full of contempt as they sneered and did everything they could to belittle me.

I looked quietly at this crowd of hypocritical, snobbish relatives, then pulled a yellowed notebook straight out of my coat.

Since you all insist on humiliating me, don't blame me for showing no mercy.

...

At the Thanksgiving family gathering, just because I didn't offer to cut the pie for my cousin, the family's darling, I earned dirty looks from every relative in the room.

"Crystal, how is it you've been single for thirty years and nobody wants you?"

"Your cousin Kathy is about to marry up to a rich, handsome billionaire's heir!"

This crowd of gossiping busybodies looked at me with scorn, but spoke of my cousin Kathy in fawning tones.

I frowned slightly, and before I could get a word in, I heard Kathy speak.

"Who says my cousin's been single for thirty years? The day I graduated from college, I saw with my own eyes how she dragged the guy she was crushing on up to the rooftop to confess."

"Too bad he wasn't interested."

When she was done, Kathy flashed me a kind smile.

On the surface she was rescuing me, but really she was airing my dirty laundry.

The moment she said it, the relatives doubled over laughing, not sparing a thought for my feelings.

Aunt Fiona chimed in even more smugly, "So what if you knocked yourself out getting a master's degree? You still got shown up by my daughter, who only went to vocational school."

"For a woman, marrying well beats doing well."

My parents couldn't stand to hear it, and were about to blow up, but I held them back.

Facing the ill-intentioned stares of my relatives, I calmly pulled a little yellowed notebook out of my bag.

What they didn't know was that I'm the family historian.

In that notebook, I'd recorded the humiliating moments of every relative, from every era.

Pick any single entry, and it would be enough to ruin their good name in old age.

Seeing that the crowd still wouldn't let up, still staring at me in mockery, I let out a cold laugh.

"Are you all finished? Because if you are, it's my turn to talk."

The moment I said it, everyone in the room traded uneasy glances.

Grandma, leaning on her cane, was the first to step up.

"Crystal, what's with that attitude?"

"Your elders were only pointing out your faults. You should accept it humbly and work to fix them. Talking like that shows no manners at all!"

I gave a sweet, obedient smile, then turned straight to face Grandma.

"So when faults get pointed out, we're supposed to work to fix them, right?"

I held up the notebook and read aloud.

"Grandma, my notebook says that when Aunt Betty was in postpartum recovery, you cooked her instant noodles every single day just to put her in her place."

"And you even walked out on my cousin, not even a month old, to go play mahjong, which left her with a chronic illness. She gets headaches and fevers every time the weather turns windy or rainy."

Hearing this, Aunt Betty recalled that unpleasant old chapter and shot Grandma a deeply resentful look.

"Grandma, you said when we do wrong we should humbly correct it, so shouldn't you apologize to Aunt Betty?"

Grandma was so choked with rage she nearly rolled her eyes back and fainted.

Uncle Frank slammed his fist on the table in fury, stood up, pointed at me, and cursed.

"You disrespectful little monster, how dare you write down your elders' embarrassing moments? You want to die!"

I gave him a cool glance.

"It's Uncle Frank, right?"

"Don't be in such a hurry. You're next."